Sick, sick, sick

It happens every year. About three or four weeks into the school year, everyone starts getting sick. Why? Because that seems to be the right amount of time for all the germs to mingle, breed and contaminate new hosts at the bacteria bank known as school. After a long summer in dormancy, hiding out in their hosts building strength they’re ready to pounce. Ready to make all their victims miserable.

Last week was Jacob’s turn for trouble. With a double ear infection, pink eye in both eyes and a sinus infection, it took three antibiotics to knock that back. Lately, I’ve been getting the brunt of their attack, although Jacob’s in round two as well.

Don’t think you’re immune just because you don’t have any children of your own in school. Take my family. Daycare, although the kids are together all summer, is just as bad as school. That’s because the older siblings bring the germs home to the little ones who take it to daycare. They give it to Jacob who so lovingly shares it with me. Although Jacob gets most of the blame for spreading disease in our family, I’m not sure I can attribute the latest round to him.

With this bug, Jacob and I both got sick at the same time with the same symptoms: runny nose, fever, swollen glands, etc. Strangely, Nate had this same affliction last week. I’m guessing this nasty germ came from the Athens area instead of the usual Medford germs we’re exposed to. Between Nate’s mom (an elementary teacher) and his brother in high school, I can think of a few suspects to trace it back to.

But I’m not completely innocent either. On my visits to schools, it’s pretty easy to pick up some of the Abbotsford and Colby viruses. Occasionally my co-workers bring one in to share from Edgar, Owen, Loyal or another nearby town. Lots of paper gets circulated through the office, giving the germs a free ride through the different departments. So pretty much, on any given day, I can get exposed to diseases spanning three counties.

Which reminds me, my mother is coming to visit later this week. She’s a school bus driver in a district that sits in the corner of four other counties. Not to mention her four kids that transmit germs. That brings a whole new breed of southern Wisconsin disease in. I was thinking of going to World Dairy Expo in Madison Saturday, but now I think I’d be better off hanging out here. That’s thousands of people mixing germs from almost all the states and several foreign countries. It all makes you really want to leave home, doesn’t it?

But here is some comforting information. With modern advances in newspaper printing, it is nearly impossible for human hands to touch the inside pages of a newspaper. That means if you do decide to hole up this winter and hide from all the germs, you can still read my paper without worry.