Sorry...kinda

When someone asks, “How are you?” how do you respond? For most people, if you are good, you say, “Fine, and you?” If you are not so good, the response will be more like, “Oh, everything is horrible right now. It’s raining, my dog/cat/canary just died, and I think I’m coming down with something.” But rarely, even if we are spectacular, do we relay that in detail to an acquaintance. That would be bragging, considered a sin equivalent to shoplifting or talking during a movie in society’s eyes.

Why do I start out this way? Well, I got in a bit a trouble at home over last week’s column. Normally, Nate doesn’t read my columns. But for some reason, he picked up a copy of the Tribune-Phonograph last week for some Friday night reading. “You make me look like an idiot,” he said in an annoyed voice. I happened to be attempting to feed Jacob a little cereal at the time, barely paying attention. I politely responded with our circulation numbers. The response I got was “the look.” You all know the one. The one a significant other gives that cannot be crossed. Most of the time, the men are on the receiving end, but roles were reversed this time.

Most of the time, my columns come out sarcastic and complaining about something. I haven’t been working in this industry too long, but I know people don’t like to read about happy, flowery, “the world is a wonderful place” stuff. As part of my job, I sometimes deliver newspapers to stores in the area. I think that comes under the “Other duties to be assigned” part of my job description. It’s interesting to see what stories make people buy a newspaper more. This fall we had an interesting contrast from one week to the next. The first was a happy picture of people carving pumpkins. Just makes your insides all warm thinking about it, huh? The next week was a dark, smokey picture of rubble that once was home to a herd of dairy cows. Guess which people wanted to read about more? That’s right, the awful reality of the barn fire disaster.

It’s just human nature to be curious about the sad events. We like to have our heart strings tugged on. We like to feel emotion. Unfortunately, it’s a lot easier to convey sadness, heartbreak, anger and stupidity than love and happiness. So Nate, here’s the thing. I could write about what a nice guy you are, but people don’t want to read about that. And, I hate to brag too much. And honey, as long as I’m writing this column, be prepared for more tongue-in-cheek remarks and occasional harassment. Each week when I write my letter to the readers, I try to come up with something most everyone can relate to and make people think about their own lives. A crazy family, goofy significant other and silly childhood memories seems to get the brain juices flowing.

So sorry, family. You’re still in my sights.